Sinclair Institute Sex Toy Blog

9th July 2007

How to get your reluctant spouse to a bed & breakfast

Does your spouse refuse to stay at a bed and breakfast? Maybe these thoughts can help you convince them:

1. It’s generally smart to begin with the usual methods of convincing — logic and the like. If that doesn’t work, resort to the more complex (sometimes trickier) options outlined below.

2. Explain that bed and breakfasts are almost universally recognized as a more personal alternative to hotels and motels. And that you can make sure you will have a private bathroom.

3. Assure your spouse that inns are run by professionals — and stay at a larger bed and breakfast (i.e. one with more than 10 rooms) at first if that helps.

4. Appeal to other interests: “The best public golf course in the state is right next to this bed and breakfast.”

5. Cut a deal: “If we stay at a bed and breakfast, I’ll buy the present for your mother’s next birthday. And your father…”

6. Make the trip a secret, but be aware that this could backfire. If your spouse gets upset when you arrive, the whole trip could be sour.

7. Be sure to pick a top-notch bed and breakfast. Get recommendations from other friends and from online discussion groups.

8. Splurge on a nice room. Perhaps your spouse will enjoy the Jacuzzi tub and king-size bed.

9. Let the innkeepers know what’s going on. They’re likely to go out of their way to help ensure a pleasant stay.

10. Be patient. Bed and breakfasts are totally different than chain hotels and motels, so it might take some time for your spouse to warm up to the experience

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6th July 2007

Great ways to say “I love you”

The best ways to say “I love you” are usually in simple, everyday, seemingly unimportant ways. Leo Buscaglia, who wrote and taught about love, said “Words and deeds that say ‘You enrich my life’ go on forever.”

Here are some suggestions to get your own creative juices flowing so that your love for one another will go on forever.

  • Make sure you say “I Love You” at least once each day to your spouse.
  • Write unexpected love notes.
  • Give your mate an unexpected hug, a surprisingly romantic kiss, or a teasing tickle often.
  • Be spontaneous and surprising with winking at each other.
  • Whisk your spouse away for an unexpected weekend alone.
  • Star-gaze together.
  • Take a walk in the rain with one another.
  • Share memories by looking at old photographs and talking about memories you share together.
  • Schedule a day to just be leisurely together.
  • Listen.
  • Share why you love your spouse.
  • Give the gift of your time by performing trivial chores for your spouse (fold clothes, run errands, wash the car, etc.)
  • Don’t forget anniversaries and birthdays.
  • Smile.
  • Blow a kiss from across the room.
  • Dance with your spouse in your own living room.
  • Hold hands.
  • Plan and cook a meal together.

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4th July 2007

Inexpensive Date Ideas

Concerts in the local park, art displays and picnics are wonderful, cheap date ideas, whether for you and your significant other, you and the kids, or you and a blind date.

Some other ideas? How about these:

  • Fill a thermos with homemade cappuccino and go parking, to watch the sunset of course.
  • Take a long, slow walk together, hand in hand.
  • Have a picnic - at the beach, in a park, on the living room floor…
  • Learn to slow dance, and do it, to the radio!
  • Dress up and go to a free art gallery or museum.
  • Pretend that you’re going to buy a car and test drive the ones you both like. (Take turns)
  • Go to the bookstore and just spend hours browsing–maybe treating yourselves to a cup of coffee.
  • Go out to breakfast rather than dinner. Save money and avoid the crowds.
  • Visit a local historical site in your area.
  • Go to a local museum, zoo or aquarium.

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30th June 2007

Food for Love

Feeding your partner is one of the best ways to share intimacy without involving sex. Whether you cook for your mate or share a nice meal out together, food is an excellent method for bonding two people.

On the sexier side, you may choose to create a “body buffet.” Select a few foods that can be eaten off your lover’s body. These can include whipped cream, berries, honey, ice cream, chocolate, and more. You can even drink champagne out of your lover’s belly button (or any other crevice you can find). Get creative and have fun!

posted in Better Sex Tips, Dating & Relationships, Valentine's Day Ideas | 6 Comments

29th June 2007

10 Compliments That Wow a Man

Nearly 70 percent of men say they wish they received more regular compliments from their partner. I’m not suggesting that every guy has to get mushy compliments every day but every once in a while it’s nice to throw one his way. Guys aren’t particularly pumped by compliments like “nice eyes” or “you’re so beautiful”. There are a few, simple things a woman can say to a man that can really get him going.

“Your arms are definitely looking bigger.”

Men can be just as paranoid about the way their bodies look as women can be. In fact, nearly 90 percent of men in a national Men, Love & Sex survey say there’s at least one body part they’d like to change (42 percent saying they want a new gut). While men don’t necessarily want women to lie if they’re out of shape, it never hurts to notice he’s looking good or at least trying to look better.

Laugh at his jokes

Guys spend all of high school, the better part of the work day, and at least 12 times a day via e-mail trying to make people laugh. Because men value their sense of humor as one of their most important qualities, a hearty, genuine laugh is as flattering as it gets.

“Wow.”

It doesn’t matter whether it comes as he’s getting undressed or after you’ve finished having sex. This short, sweet word (best done in a whisper) may just be the ultimate ego-stroke. A picture may say a thousand words, but this three-letter word sums up roughly 10,000 of them.

“You are the man.”

Guys hear this all the time from other guys. But if it comes from a woman, no matter the context, the message is that, hey, we’re buddies, too. This is actually pretty darn sexy.
“The kids just adore you.”

More than 50 percent of men say that their families are what defines them most as men. So when a woman affirms that he’s a familial hero, it’s a compliment that stretches way beyond anything you could ever say about his haircut.

“What do you think?”

We’ve all seen it a million times with long-married couples: they engage in cerebral power struggles, where neither can concede on anything — whether it’s the best way to move a piece of furniture or the fastest way to reach the interstate. I’m not saying that men should have the only say in decisions, but some guys do feel like they actually have very little.

“Cute feet.”

Typically, it doesn’t matter much to men if women like a part of their body that they don’t control, like their eyes or body hair. And typically guys don’t care for the word “cute” yet there’s one exception and that’s the part of the body that is classified as being especially gross. Tell a guy he has good feet, and somehow he takes it as a double-wammy of a compliment. You are saying that you not only like his genetics, but also that you appreciate he can keep himself better groomed than the rest of the guys.

“Meow.”

The stats show that 61 percent of men think their partners aren’t sexually adventurous enough. While a feline one-liner doesn’t automatically qualify as adventurous, it does show a bit of inhibition, and the message is one he likes to hear: That perhaps he’s brought a little bit of the animal out of you.

“Impressive.”

Guys love accomplishments. They love being acknowledged for their strength, power, and, simply, their masculinity. So a well-timed observation like this one — whether it comes after he carries a TV to the family room or figures out a way to fix the pipes without having to call the plumber — feeds into his need to feel like the family protector.

“I want you.”

Again, women don’t need to go on about a guy’s eyes or hair or clothes. What a guy really wants to hear is that he’s the total package, and this acknowledgement of that — whether it’s referring to bedroom behavior or relationship stability — is the ultimate compliment of them all.

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