Sinclair Institute Sex Toy Blog

2nd January 2008

Importance of Foreplay

Traditionally, “foreplay” was considered to be something that a man had to do to get his partner ready for sexual intercourse. Today, foreplay has become an integral part of the whole lovemaking experience. It is true that impromptu sexual encounters without foreplay can sometimes be some of the best sexual experiences, but in general, most women will agree that good sexual encounters mean that you learn the importance of foreplay. A more vigilant form of foreplay will bring increased pleasure to both partners, and make the whole lovemaking experience more enjoyable.

Spice up your sex life

Especially with age, both partners will need a little extra spice to get fully aroused and achieve maximum pleasure. Hence you need to learn the importance of foreplay. The man will need to prolong foreplay to get an erection and the woman will need the same to become properly lubricated. Most sex experts agree that there is no such thing as spending too much time on foreplay. The trick is to start intercourse when both partners are peaking with excitement and are having a hard time controlling their desires.

What is foreplay?

You’ve gotta learn the importance of foreplay, which can encompass a wide range of activities, including hugging, fondling, undressing, kissing, petting, and performing oral sex. Why is foreplay so important? First of all, men who cuddle and kiss their partners and know how to enjoy sensitive foreplay will often find that their partners will not only enjoy sexual intercourse more, but will also see their partners reach orgasm more easily. Most women need prolonged stimulation in order to reach a state of complete arousal, and foreplay will provide them with the required stimulation.

No ultimate foreplay

There is no such thing as the ultimate foreplay, and it is not about pressing the right buttons in the right order. It is about understanding what makes your partner get hot and delivering the things that make her experience intense pleasure. All women are different. Some get off on being lightly kissed all over their necks while others enjoy direct oral stimulation.

There are many ways to give your partner extreme sensations, but one thing is for sure: It all begins in her brain. Simply tell her how beautiful she is and how much you appreciate her sexy body. By complimenting her appearance, especially if her confidence level is low, you are giving her added security and excitement, as well as giving her good reasons to go all out with the foreplay.

Set the mood

To learn the importance of foreplay you have to know how to set the mood. The next step is paying attention to romantic details. Creating the right environment for sexual intercourse can be crucial, especially at mature stages in the relationship. For example, make sure the room is warm, the lighting subdued, and the sheets clean. Once the mood is right, take the time to undress her because the act of removing your partner’s clothes can be an important part of foreplay. Many have found that undressing increases the eroticism, it stimulates and intensifies the feeling.

Often, women spend a lot of money on nice lingerie because it makes them feel sexy and they want it to stay on for a while. Instead of getting her completely naked, remove her bra strap, kiss her shoulder, then put it back on again. Do the same with her underwear, and, again; compliment how good she looks in it.

Kissing and foreplay

During foreplay, go as slow as you can. This will tease her. Begin by kissing and caressing her. A kiss is usually the first physical expression of desire but it is also often forgotten during sexual intercourse. During intercourse, you should kiss every part of your partner’s body and not be restricted to the mouth. Most women complain that their partners don’t kiss long enough and rush the movement directly to the genital area. Don’t be shy to experiment on every part of her body and remember to prolong the foreplay with more kissing and caressing.

A good time for learning

This article focused on the importance of foreplay as it is a learning experience. Foreplay is the perfect time to spend understanding what your partner likes because without that, you will never learn what she really needs to be fully stimulated. Don’t be shy; ask for feedback and also give your own. Both partners profit from good communication during foreplay and lovemaking. Also, without cutting the intensity of the moment, ask her what she really likes and what makes her go wild.

The time of her life

As a general rule, if she is satisfied with her sexual experience, she will usually make sure that you are satisfied as well. Good luck, and remember that only practice makes perfect. Don’t ever forget the importance of foreplay.

By David Strovny

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29th November 2007

The best foods for your sex drive

There are many diets out there but have you heard of the sex diet?

Foods that are healthy for your heart are also good for your libido. If your arteries are clogged, there is no way the blood will flow to your penis or vagina.

Oysters are a well-known aphrodisiac because oysters contain zinc which increases libido. One oyster has the daily recommended dose of zinc so you can only imagine what a plate of them can do. If you don’t like Oysters then you can get zinc from any source of protein. Protein is essential for producing sperm in men. Some foods that are high in zinc are turkey, beef, beans, and pine nuts.

Pine nuts, out of all the nuts, have the most amount of protein and they are full of healthful mono-saturated fats which helps lower your bad cholesterol.

There are some veggies that are good for your sex drive too. Asparagus contains foliate which is necessary for histamine production and histamine is necessary for both males and females to reach orgasm. Other vegetables are artichokes and avocados.

There are also some spices that are great. Chili pepper and ginger help to improve circulation. Hot spices like cayenne, curry and cumin help warm things up.

Some foods that are good for your heart and good for your libido include red wine and champagne. Too much alcohol can have an adverse effect and actually decrease sexual potency.
Chocolate is known to release serotonin in your brain, which provides a calming soothing effect so that sort of gets you in the mood. But the sugar also gets you heart going because it increases your serum glucose levels so you feel a rush of energy.

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3rd October 2007

What’s Slipping?

VENIS is Very Erotic Non-Insertive Sex. VENIS is a highly erotic sexual technique that has men and women turning “foreplay” into the “the play”. VENIS sexual-enhancement techniques were originally developed to teach adolescents about safer sex, but have since turned into a cult of carnal wonder for couples.

Here’s the catch: “no penetration allowed”. Sexual pleasure without intercourse is the simple point of VENIS. It’s an exciting alternative for anyone who’s looking to spice up a lackluster love life. It’s an opportunity not to just treat erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation but eliminate it as a concern.

Technique for Tonight From Better Sex: Slipping Party

Turn on some sexy music with a dance beat. While he is sitting on the edge of a chair or bed approach him either dressed in very scant lingerie or completely naked holding a bottle of silicone lube or massage oil. Better Sex Buzz Team recommends a one hand pump type bottle of personal lubricant like Better Sex Personal Lubricant for easy application. Hand him the lube and then undress him seductively in any way you see fit.

Then give him the rules:

1. He can squirt the lube anywhere he wants on himself or you.
2. He cannot touch you with his hands and he can only touch himself
3. As the woman, you can use your hands or the lube anywhere at anytime
4. No penetration

Ask him to apply the lube or oil on your breast, thighs and buttock or on his naked body in select areas. Once you are well oiled, and slick to the touch, rub your body against his – your back to his front, your front to his front. He has no limitations, accept under no circumstance is he allowed to touch you with his hands, and there can never be penetration, so be creative with these rules. At some point when you are really hot, straddle the place on his leg where it meets his hip, then, undulate and rub your clitoris on his thigh. If you can’t hold back any longer, you have permission to touch his privates but eventually ask him to take over as you get closer to orgasm so you can really focus on achieving that euphoric pulse. If your man is so inclined you can add a little twist to the slipping party called “the hook”. Have him stand up and lean back against the wall. Reach around or through his open legs and place you finger or a mini vibrating bullet or vibrating egg in or around his anus to really put him over the edge.

From Bettersex.com

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18th September 2007

5 Tips For Better Sex Tonight

5 Tips For Better Sex Tonight

Tip # 1: Respect

Most people agree that one of the biggest pleasures in a relationship is through mutual respect. Developing intimacy requires developing a healthy respect for your mate. Remember what it was that drew you to our partner in the first place. What makes him/her feel like “home” to you? When you have these answers, treat them like mantras you repeat silently throughout the day. Over time, it will become an unconscious act. In those moments when you and your partner are not seeing eye-to-eye — and these happen for everyone — the memory of why you are with him/her will renew the respect you have.

Tip # 2: Adult Movies

Adult Movies are a helpful method for spicing up your sex life. Whether or not you have a partner, watching adult films can certainly assist you in improving your skills as a lover, but many of the how-to videos and DVDs are extremely educational from a scientific standpoint. Many feature commentary by medical doctors and licensed sex therapists, who offer invaluable knowledge about how the male and female body functions during sex. In addition, you are often able to view real couples putting lessons they learned into practice, which serves to demonstrate that we are all capable of having satisfying sex lives.

Tip # 3: Fellatio

Fellatio is the technical term for oral sex performed on a man. Its root is from the Latin verb meaning “to suck.” For many men, oral sex is a more intense experience than intercourse. This is due to the concentration of stimulation to the penis by mouth, tongue, and hands. Each man has different areas of concentrated sensitivity, so it’s important for a man to communicate what is pleasurable to him during oral sex. If he is not comfortable speaking out loud about his needs, he should gently guide his lover either with his hands or let her know when she’s doing the right thing by making some oral indication such as telling her he likes what she’s doing or sometimes even just a moan will send the message!

Tip # 4: Prolonging Pleasure

As a general rule, the longer the stimulation, the larger the release. This is true physically as well as mentally. In order to prolong pleasure during lovemaking and prevent male orgasm from occurring too soon, it’s important to start slowly. Even just talking to each other about the sex you’d like to have is a turn-on, and can initiate arousal. Once you begin to touch, you may wish to begin with a backrub or deep kissing before moving to intercourse. Once you do begin making love, you can also bring a man back from the brink of orgasm with a squeezing technique. Just prior to his orgasm, put your thumb on one side of the base of the penis and the tips of your index and middle fingers on the other side, then squeeze.

Tip # 5: Sensual Massage

Sexual technique is not always about doing super tricks in bed. Much of lovemaking occurs before the act of intercourse even begins. In part, knowing how to be a good lover means knowing how to touch. Sensual massage is a wonderful way to connect to your partner, and to learn what feels good to him/her. It is also a very bonding act. Three basic types of massage can be practiced. There’s a general soothing massage, where you simply use oils or lotion and gently rub your lover’s body head to toe. In a body to body massage, you use your own body to assist in the massage, sliding up and down his/he back, using hair, nails or even playful bites. Some massage sessions may progress to masturbating your partner as part of the rub-down. Pay attention to your partner’s reactions as you massage or establish ahead of time what type of massage you will give/receive so that both of you achieve the maximum pleasure.

From BetterSex

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12th July 2007

How to Talk Dirty

Talking dirty to the one you love is one of those sexual behaviors people are uncomfortable with the first time they do it, and the first time they do it with a new partner. To do it well means letting loose and exposing yourself, which always feels scary the first time. Here are some steps to getting comfortable with dirty talk, and ideas for introducing into your sex play.

Here’s How:

Be authentic in your dirty talk.
Dirty talk can feel silly if you expect it to be what you’ve seen in the movies. You might have this idea that dirty talk is something specific. But good dirty talk is completely what you make it, and to do it well, you have to be yourself. While you may take on a role in your dirty talk you need to find something of yourself in the role.

Find your dirty talk voice.
You need to find your own way of talking dirty. Your dirty talk might be low rhythmic grunts, high pitched squeals, or precise whispers. It might reflect the way you talk in your daily life, or it might express a different aspect of your personality. Experiment with speed, how fast you talk. Change the volume of your voice, try whispering, try screaming, try everything in the middle. You can sound commanding and harsh, trembling and uncertain, and everywhere in between.

Expand your dirty talk vocabulary.
Most of us are raised not to swear. Dirty talk is your opportunity to pull out all the stops on the foul mouth express. Unless you’re role playing calls for it, avoid clinical terms (like penis). You can do research online, by reading some raunchy erotica.

Practice dirty talk when you’re alone.
Carol Queen, author of the highly recommended Exhibitionism for the Shy, suggests starting on your own, talking dirty while you masturbate. Fantasize about having sex with your partner and talking dirty to them. You can start by doing it in your head, but eventually do it out loud.

Establish ground rules with your partner.
One of the reasons many of us don’t talk dirty is fear of sounding ridiculous, or being put down or rejected by a partner. It’s important to set some rules when you’re willing to take risks like this. Rules like no laughing at one another, and no judgment are important. In the heat of the moment anything can come out of your mouth, and you need to know that your partner is respectful of the ways that can be exposing.

Start slow the first time.
Don’t feel you have to rush right into elaborate dirt talk. A great way to start with dirty talk is to describe out loud what is happening during sex. Things like “I love the way your hand feels in my….” Or “Your …feels so good on/in my…” Describe what’s happening and how it feels in your body. You can also experiment by telling your partner something you’re going to do to them, or something you want them to do to you.

Make dirty talking a two way conversation.
Once you’ve taken the risk and initiated talking dirty with your partner, ask them to do the same. It isn’t for everyone, and you might find that you like doing it more than hearing it (or vice versa). But being on the receiving and the giving end of dirty talk can give you a different perspective on it, plus you may learn a few things from your partner you didn’t already know.

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